at August 17, 2006 6:20 AMI have been in enough discussions around the internet that I have seen all kinds of debaters. There are all kinds of people - those who use logic and facts coldly (one of the reasons why I like the cartely guys), those who are much too emotional to think logically (I have fallen in this category quite a few times), those who don’t have a point to make, but hate the people on the other side anyways, aka Trolls. In reality, one person is capable of being all three types in the same discussion, but most people seem to take on a single persona and use it to the maximum effect.
There is also a very thin line between what makes a person a troll vs. what makes you stop and listen to someone on the other side of the fence from you. I am trying to basically see where that line is and what it is that makes a person turn off from discussions. The internet being what it is, debaters are completely cut off from visual cues that usually signal if something is a friendly banter or a deathmatch between avowed foes. Words that sound a certain way to person typing them might not necessarily come off the same way to the other person or a casual reader unaware of the context.
I don’t comment on anything anymore at Desicritics for example, since I think it is an echo chamber with a few people peering down their lofty perches at a few other people who try the opposing view. No one even argues anymore - people simply sneer at each other.
We here recently had a troll attack - he claims he only wants me to hear his side. Well, hello! How are you going to reason with me when you start off by calling me names? What makes you think I will not only listen to you but agree with your point when you call me awful things? Maybe you don’t want to change minds, but just fling feces around - that makes you the worst kind of troll.
There have definitely been tough discussions on this blog on lots of different topics - I have been argued against and hung out to dry, sometimes by people who are close friends with me offline. It was fun - even if the discussions got emotional, we could set the differences aside as simply differing opinions. We didn’t hate each other or think less of one another.
It is when you start demonizing your opposition or ascribing evil to them that the discussion is as good as dead anyways.
Person 1: I really think X is far better than Y.
Person 2: I knew it! You evil, horrible person - how can you like X?
Person 1: You are too stupid to like X - how dare you support Y?
So ends that discussion. Just like any discussion where people use words like “Dhimmicrat” or “Rethuglican” and actually mean it - I mean, seriously! If all Republicans are evil and all Democrats are too dumb to tie their own shoelaces, why even have an American government? We might as well outsource governance to Bangalore. Is an Indian accented President that much worse than a Texas-accented one?
Coming back to the point though, if you want to be taken seriously, if you want others to listen to you and actually agree with you - please, please don’t start the debate off by assuming the other person sucks. Start it in good faith - assume that the other person is as good as you think you are. Treat them with respect till they deserve no more. Once you see they don’t deserve anymore, stomp them into the ground with facts and cold-blooded logic!
Posted by shanti at August 16, 2006 12:22 PMTrackBack URL for this entry:
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I appreciate you admitting that you can be emotional while discussing certain issues but I agree that the quality of comments has largely deteriorated in the blogosphere (probably the effect of quantity).
I have seen the steady decline on my blog too…makes me wanna also shut off comments. Some even abuse me and then in the same breath send me tips to their own posts for DesiPundit. Makes me laugh.
Posted by: Patrix at August 16, 2006 9:33 PM
LOL, Patrix. I thought bloggers had an inflated sense of entitlement - I see more and more that commenters are even worse.
Posted by: shanti at August 17, 2006 6:20 AM
All right, the lady is back in form! I hope you still remember me :huh:
I’m actually surprised that you had to write a post explaining this! Over all these years, I’ve concluded that there are way too many blogs which have killed the spirit of argument/opinion exchanges, etc which used to be aplenty in the ‘good old days.’
Keep blogging and don’t forget that flickr thingie your promised in your earlier post. My yahoo id: bdeepu@yahoo.com.
Posted by: Sandeep at August 19, 2006 1:32 AM
I know, Sandeep - for his credit, the person who started this thought process in me has apologized to me and asked me to delete his comments from the previous post, which I did. It does still surprise me that grown-ups need to be taught how to talk in public.
Will add you to my Flickr contacts right away :)
Posted by: shanti at August 19, 2006 6:32 AM